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Life on Mars fic: "Rubbish" (G)
Title: Rubbish
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
hjea
Summary: Sam tries to introduce recycling to the CID.
Words: 529
Rating: G
Characters/Pairing: Sam plus everyone. Gen.
Spoilers/Timeline: None.
Disclaimer: Life on Mars is not my intellectual property, but that of the Beeb and Kudos. What I've got is rabid Sam Tyler adoration.
Author's Note: I'm not sure really where this comes from, though obviously I need to pay massive homage to the short film "Rubbish" from which I snurched my title. If you haven't seen it, go do - it's British and funny and full of "yay, recycling!" Anyway, this was really fun to write. :) Beta'd by the fantasticinara223
“We have the opportunity to make a difference here.”
Sam stood in the middle of the CID, hands on hips, smiling smugly.
“By separating what we’d normally just chuck out, and recycling what we can, it’ll put less strain on the department to stay clean-”
Sam eyed the overflowing bin at his feet with undisguised revulsion.
“-and help the environment immensely. And believe you me, we want to stay ahead of the curve on this one. Now, where I come from-”
“Hyde?” supplied Chris, Ray and Annie in unison.
“Yes, Hyde,” Sam shot back. “We separate the rubbish into paper, plastics, metal and compost. Thus…” Sam gleefully began passing around plastic bags to everyone, and dumped the contents of the bin on the floor.
“Right!” He rubbed his hands together. “Everybody, go to! Annie, you can get the paper – newspapers, magazines, shredded documents. Chris, anything plastic or metal, and Ray, food items. Old donuts, apple cores, anything biodegradable really. Oh, and used tissues.”
“Don’t use ’em, boss,” Chris piped up before Ray could even throw Sam a dirty look. “That’s what a man’s hanky’s for, innit?” He helpfully dug his out of his pocket and demonstrated by loudly blowing his nose.
Sam made a face. “That’s great, Chris. You’re, you know, reusing and that’s…” he swallowed distastefully, “…really great.”
“Tyler!”
Gene Hunt’s voice suddenly barked from the doorway. “What the bloody hell is going on here?” He strode towards the mess of rubbish spread across the floor. “I thought the point was to clean up the department, not invite a pack of sodding pigs to move in?”
Sam rolled his eyes. “I am, Guv! By recycling, we’ll lessen the strain-“
“What are we, bunch of fairies? Just put the man who doesn’t empty the bins for his turn in the cells for a few hours. Couple choice cellmates, he’ll never forget again! Now. Chris, Ray, we’ve got a witness to question so let’s move. Cartwright, make yourself bloody useful and finish my filing.” Gene sniffed and turned on his heel. “Now!”
Ray smirked and shoved his plastic bag at Sam’s chest before following Gene out of the room. Chris smiled and shrugged. “Sorry, boss,” he said, and happily tagged behind.
Sam sighed and looked down. “Well, I guess I could get it started, but tomorrow…”
Annie took a step towards him and smiled sweetly.
“I think it’s really wonderful, Sam, you being so concerned ‘bout the earth. That it’s so important to you.”
Sam smiled back, eyes softening. “Thanks, Annie.” He gestured to the rubbish, “Do you want to help me sort this out?”
“Oh,” Annie’s eyes dropped from his gaze, “I, uh… I would, but you heard the Guv. I got … filing.”
“But…” Sam’s eyebrows pinched together. “Didn’t you finish all that yes-“
Annie was already halfway out of CID.
“What was that?” She threw over her shoulder as she made her way out the door.
Sam opened his mouth and closed it, watching as everyone in the office seemed to vanish into the woodwork.
“Well, fine then.” He scowled and looked up at the ceiling.
“I’ll just save the planet on my own!”
THE END.
Author:
hjea Summary: Sam tries to introduce recycling to the CID.
Words: 529
Rating: G
Characters/Pairing: Sam plus everyone. Gen.
Spoilers/Timeline: None.
Disclaimer: Life on Mars is not my intellectual property, but that of the Beeb and Kudos. What I've got is rabid Sam Tyler adoration.
Author's Note: I'm not sure really where this comes from, though obviously I need to pay massive homage to the short film "Rubbish" from which I snurched my title. If you haven't seen it, go do - it's British and funny and full of "yay, recycling!" Anyway, this was really fun to write. :) Beta'd by the fantastic
inara223 “We have the opportunity to make a difference here.”
Sam stood in the middle of the CID, hands on hips, smiling smugly.
“By separating what we’d normally just chuck out, and recycling what we can, it’ll put less strain on the department to stay clean-”
Sam eyed the overflowing bin at his feet with undisguised revulsion.
“-and help the environment immensely. And believe you me, we want to stay ahead of the curve on this one. Now, where I come from-”
“Hyde?” supplied Chris, Ray and Annie in unison.
“Yes, Hyde,” Sam shot back. “We separate the rubbish into paper, plastics, metal and compost. Thus…” Sam gleefully began passing around plastic bags to everyone, and dumped the contents of the bin on the floor.
“Right!” He rubbed his hands together. “Everybody, go to! Annie, you can get the paper – newspapers, magazines, shredded documents. Chris, anything plastic or metal, and Ray, food items. Old donuts, apple cores, anything biodegradable really. Oh, and used tissues.”
“Don’t use ’em, boss,” Chris piped up before Ray could even throw Sam a dirty look. “That’s what a man’s hanky’s for, innit?” He helpfully dug his out of his pocket and demonstrated by loudly blowing his nose.
Sam made a face. “That’s great, Chris. You’re, you know, reusing and that’s…” he swallowed distastefully, “…really great.”
“Tyler!”
Gene Hunt’s voice suddenly barked from the doorway. “What the bloody hell is going on here?” He strode towards the mess of rubbish spread across the floor. “I thought the point was to clean up the department, not invite a pack of sodding pigs to move in?”
Sam rolled his eyes. “I am, Guv! By recycling, we’ll lessen the strain-“
“What are we, bunch of fairies? Just put the man who doesn’t empty the bins for his turn in the cells for a few hours. Couple choice cellmates, he’ll never forget again! Now. Chris, Ray, we’ve got a witness to question so let’s move. Cartwright, make yourself bloody useful and finish my filing.” Gene sniffed and turned on his heel. “Now!”
Ray smirked and shoved his plastic bag at Sam’s chest before following Gene out of the room. Chris smiled and shrugged. “Sorry, boss,” he said, and happily tagged behind.
Sam sighed and looked down. “Well, I guess I could get it started, but tomorrow…”
Annie took a step towards him and smiled sweetly.
“I think it’s really wonderful, Sam, you being so concerned ‘bout the earth. That it’s so important to you.”
Sam smiled back, eyes softening. “Thanks, Annie.” He gestured to the rubbish, “Do you want to help me sort this out?”
“Oh,” Annie’s eyes dropped from his gaze, “I, uh… I would, but you heard the Guv. I got … filing.”
“But…” Sam’s eyebrows pinched together. “Didn’t you finish all that yes-“
Annie was already halfway out of CID.
“What was that?” She threw over her shoulder as she made her way out the door.
Sam opened his mouth and closed it, watching as everyone in the office seemed to vanish into the woodwork.
“Well, fine then.” He scowled and looked up at the ceiling.
“I’ll just save the planet on my own!”
THE END.
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I am two episodes into the second Series of LOM. I should be finished by the end of the week. I already know what happens but i can't wait for A2A because i am a huuuuuge 80's phreak!